"Golden Leg" Fung (Ng Man-Tat), a Hong Kong soccer star, beats and berates his teammate Hung (Patrick Tse) when the latter offers him a check to lose the game, claiming to be the middleman. Fung takes the check in the end and throws the game. Angry spectators beat him and break his leg.Twenty years later, Fung walks with a limp and is the mistreated lackey of Hung, now a successful businessman. When Fung asks to coach Hung's soccer team, Hung mocks him and reveals he tricked him with a bad check and hired those who broke his leg. Hung owns Team Evil which has won the league for 5 years straight now. While drinking his sorrows in the streets, Fung comes across Sing (Stephen Chow), a Shaolin Kung Fu master who wants to promote the practical benefits of the martial art to the world. Sing says that with Kung Fu people can perform common tasks such as parallel parking their cars, trimming the hedges and recovering from a slip on the banana peel much better. No one takes Kung Fu classes from Sing, however, as he is dirty and poor. He steals Mantou from Mui (Zhao Wei), a woman with severe acne who uses Tai chi to make the food.At first disdainful, Fung soon discovers the power of Sing's leg and offers to coach him in soccer. Fung sees firsthand that a soda can kicked by Sing ends up demolishing a brick wall a far distance away. Then Fung sees Sing fighting a gang of ruffians and defeating them with his kicking skills.Compelled by the idea of promoting Kung Fu through soccer, Sing asks his former Shaolin brothers to join his team. The winning team in the National SuperCup Tournament earns one million dollars. Sing's brothers include Iron Head (Wong Yat-Fei) (His style of Kung Fu utilizes his immensely hard head, and he specializes in headers during matches. He was employed as a waiter at a bar), Hooking Leg (Mok Mei-Lam) (As the team's full-back, Hooking Leg's Shaolin skills resemble ground tumbling boxing, which he uses to keep the ball away from the opponent and confuse them. He is employed as a dishwasher), Iron Shirt (Tin Kai-Man) (As the team's full-back, Iron Shirt can absorb blunt force attacks without injuries, as well as hold and propel the ball with his abdomen. He is a successful businessman), Empty Hand (Danny Chan Kwok-Kwan) (Empty Hand resembles Bruce Lee to the point of wearing his yellow and black jumpsuit from Game of Death. As the team's goalkeeper, his fast hands and powerful arms allow him to instantly and accurately catch objects thrown at him. He is unemployed), Light Weight Vest (Lam Chi-Chung) (He is the team's winger. Despite his illness, he is capable of utilizing his style of Kung Fu to leap incredible heights, giving the illusion of flight. He is employed at a retail store as store attendant). The brothers were trained by the same Shaolin master, and they had promised the master that they would help teach others the art of Kung Fu.As a test, Fung arranges a game with Team Rebellion known for vicious cheating led by their captain (Fung Min-Hun). The thug team gives the Shaolin team a beating. Fung explains to Sing that soccer is war and that Sing has to figure out a way to win. When all seems lost, the Shaolin team members reawaken their powers and utilize them to defeat the other team. The thugs ask to join Sing's team.Sing takes Mui to try on expensive dresses at a high-end department store after hours and offers to buy her one as thanks. Sing tells Mui that she is beautiful and that she should have the confidence to believe in herself. She gets a makeover to impress him, though the team and her boss mock her exaggerated '80s look. When Mui hints at her feelings for Sing, he tells her he only wants to be friends. She disappears after her boss fires her. Sing is told by the boss that Mui's buns were no longer sweet but salty. Sing realizes that the buns were salty due to the salt from her tears that were falling into the dough.Team Shaolin enters the open cup competition in Hong Kong, where they see ridiculously one-sided victories due to their powers. They only meet their match in the final against Hung's Team Evil, who have superhuman strength and speed due to an American drug. The goalkeeper of Team Evil (Cao Hua) can stop all shots at his goal with one hand inside his pocket. Sing's best and most powerful shots are also unable to move the goalkeeper even a tiny bit.The referee has also been bought out by Hung. Team Evil badly injures two of Team Shaolin's goalkeepers; the powerless members of Team Shaolin flee. As the team is about to lose by default, Mui, who has shaved her head, reappears to be their goalkeeper. When Team Evil's striker kicks the ball with flaming force towards Mui, she stops it with Tai Chi. She and Sing combine their skills and rocket the ball downfield. The ball blows through Team Evil's goal while hurling along all its players, scoring the sole and winning goal.Later, Hung is imprisoned for doping, while the Team Evil players receive lifetime bans. Sing goes out for a jog and is pleased to see people around him using Kung Fu in their everyday lives, his lifelong dream having become a reality. A large ad on the side of a building shows that Sing and Mui, a famous couple, have won the world championship in bowling, among other things.